talking shit

[Steve Lurkel]

Do you or do you not talk shit when you go to sporting events?

what are your limits?

what subjects do you tend to focus on, what do you make no mention of?

who have been some of your best targets?

what are some of your more memorable chirps?

do you chirp fans of the other team?

This thread was spawned because on July 31 i'm going to see the Jays retire (the GOAT) Roberto Alomar's number + HOF ceremony. It happens to be against the Rangers. I happen to be sitting in LF. There is a LOT of shit to get on Josh Hamilton about. As much as I love the game, baseball is boring as shit if you're not talking a whole grip of doodoo.

Personally, I do a whollllle bunch of shit talking, and I project really well which works out great. I only really go to Raptors games and Blue Jays games, and being a fan of those two teams there isn't a lot to cheer about, sooooo. I'll also talk shit if i happen to be at a game in another city.

I never talk shit about a persons family, unless it is someone like Lamar Odom, in which case I will talk shit about his pig of a husband all day. Usually i'll try to throw some abstract shit out there, like a few weekends ago when the phillies were in town I yelled to Victorino "Shane, here is a list of islands I prefer to Hawaii: The Galapagos, The Caymans, The Falklands....Australia"

In the NBA it's a bit harder to get full sentences in, but there are always opportunities. Two seasons ago the Raptors were playing one game against (i think) the Nets, and we were up like 30 by halftime. Jay Triano had played everyone but Antoine Wright, because Wright had spoken out in the media about some players (bargs and bosh) being treated softly. For the entire second half, at nearly every whistle, I was yelling at Triano to put 'Toine in. I carried it on for the rest of the season for the remaining (probably 8 or 9) games i went to. My brother happened to see Amir Johnson in the offseason and went up to him and said "yo, tell jay to put in 'Toine" and Amir was on some "that was you? yoooo the whole team has been crackin up all year about that." good shit.

some of my better targets have been Carlos Lee, Carmelo Anthony (courtside - actually talked a lot of shit back and forth with me), Dahntay Jones (same game), Jameer Nelson, and that's all I remember right now although i'm sure there are more. I'm sure Josh Hamilton will be added to the list.

[Gregg Popabitch]

man, i thought this thread was about talking shit in pickup basketball games, softball games, football games, etc.

because i talk a lot of shit.

[Tommy Bunz]

I'll always run my mouth some if i'm in earshot.
I've gotten Pat Burrell to give me the finger in the middle of a game (told him he needs to stop banging whales in the bathroom of the Irish Pub and that he has std's). Also made him double over in laughter making fun of Brett Myers.
Got Nick Swisher to give me the finger before too (know one of his ex-girlfriends and had some inside info)

Bullpen seats are the best cause those guys go nuts. Internet phones have made harassing people so much easier cause now you can find out the names of guys wives in just a few seconds. Ryan Franklin actually tried to get my brother kicked out of a game for telling him his wife was cheating on him.

In general I don't talk real shit on other fans unless they are being obnoxious in our house, then the floodgates are open and I will berate you and throw hotdogs at your face.

[Random Sample]

I am usually not down low enough to talk shit. except for baseball games. And I end up usually talking shit on my own players.

In 2006 at a pirate game, I was first row by third base and I told Joe Randa how shitty he was the entire game. The third base ump came over to me at the stretch and said "damn your giving him a hard time." I said it's because he sucks.

Then when I was in college I got drunk one game and let Kevin Young know how I felt about him. I got kicked out of the stadium for that one.

[peanut butter]

I never talk shit about a persons family, unless it is someone like Lamar Odom, in which case I will talk shit about his pig of a husband all day.

Fucked up, but hella funny.


PEACE

[Req]

For the entire second half, at nearly every whistle, I was yelling at Triano to put 'Toine in. I carried it on for the rest of the season for the remaining (probably 8 or 9) games i went to. My brother happened to see Amir Johnson in the offseason and went up to him and said "yo, tell jay to put in 'Toine" and Amir was on some "that was you? yoooo the whole team has been crackin up all year about that."

Carmelo Anthony (courtside - actually talked a lot of shit back and forth with me),

MOAR

[Kid That's Lifeless]

The only pro player I've ever gotten a dirty look from was Jose Guillen because I yelled "Hola Jose, donde estan los steroids?" at him.

[capable_keL]

The only pro player I've ever gotten a dirty look from was Jose Guillen because I yelled "Hola Jose, donde estan los steroids?" at him.

[Tweak Da Leak]

I usually talk shit to the fans since most the games i go to are in and around the bay area.

[Gregg Popabitch]

on the day of one of the NBA drafts i went to (it was the one with steph curry, beasley, rose), they had one of those nba street jam things on the side street next to MSG. so I'm rolling through, giving pounds to chris russo and shit like that when i see dudes on line for a free throw shooting contest. i'm like no doubt let me peep this.

lo and behold, the winner of the contest before me would get the chance to face off against BJ armstrong in a free throw shooting contest.

so this dude wins and starts up against BJ. goes 7 for 10. BJ goes up there. I get into it. "Did Jordan's coat tails have saddles?" "How many people did you have to pay off to become an all star starter in '94?" "Steve Kerr played your role better then you did." "Worst All Star Starter of All time!!" "Why didn't you ever get braces? Did Krause low ball you too?" "Why did your mom name you after her favorite activity?" "Do you know how many players on the knicks could've won championships if they played with Jordan? You can't count that high. Your coach probably had someone take algebra for you when you were in college." Along those lines.

After draining the first 5 shots, he looks directly at me on the sideline and doesn't turn his gaze while shooting his last 5, making 4 of them.

"Good muscle memory but your name's still BJ."

[Kiran187]

Jose Canseco is playing for Yuma in the Golden League which is a non-affliated minor league. They stopped by in Calgary to play our team a few weeks ago and me and some of the homies rolled to the game to heckle him. We find that as long as you don't swear you can pretty much say whatever you want without getting kicked out though we did get warned for making some steroid-related comments:

"Hey Jose, let's grab drinks after the game. I'll bring the gin and you bring the JUICE!"

"Hey Jose, I really wanna bulk up for the summer. Any suggestions?"

etc, etc.

[Prophecy]

The only pro player I've ever gotten a dirty look from was Jose Guillen because I yelled "Hola Jose, donde estan los steroids?" at him.

If you want a prime time place to talk shit where you know players will hear you go to a USF basketball game.

[Kid That's Lifeless]

The only pro player I've ever gotten a dirty look from was Jose Guillen because I yelled "Hola Jose, donde estan los steroids?" at him.

If you want a prime time place to talk shit where you know players will hear you go to a USF basketball game.

Realest shit you ever wrote. I actually was going to mention this in my first post. I actually started heckling Stan Heath a couple times when he would take out Ron Anderson.

[Smithee]

Do you or do you not talk shit when you go to sporting events?

I talk hella shit.

what are your limits?

Depends on if it's a home game and if not, how many large men ( ) I'm rollin' w/ that are sporting my team w/ me.

My main goal is to not start a brawl/fight. I'm 27 years old and definitely too old to come into work w/ a black-eye Monday over a football game.

I also try to not swear if there's kids around. But I've been known to be guilty of this. Especially if I'm sitting up in the cheap seats. Fuck it.

what subjects do you tend to focus on, what do you make no mention of?

Facts of the team's history and current media stuff that's going on. Whether it's about the location a team represents or something a particular player of theirs has been seen or accused of doing.

Refer to the last question as to what I hold back on saying. I try not to hold back on anything, though. It's war.

Once in the 2007 NBA playoffs I expressed my feelings of how (at that vry moment) I hoped Derrick Fisher's hospitalized daughter would die. I'll never take it that far again...

It also usually depends on who you're talking shit to.

Like if I'm in the beachers @ Dodger Stadium surrounded by a grip of angry Surrenos, for example, I'm keeping my mouth shut. (take note, Giants fans)

who have been some of your best targets?

Definitely Utah (BYU mainly) and Texas.

what are some of your more memorable chirps?

Too many to list!

One that comes to mind first for w/e reason was this confused young Texan wearing a real serious cowboy hat on a Pasadena city bus (who actually tounge-kissed his ugly ass g/f in front of us to prove he wasn't "queer") in 2006 headed to the Rose Bowl getting rele upset because he couldn't figure out what we meant by "Reggie Kush"

do you chirp fans of the other team?.

if by chirp, you mean "talk shit" then hell yea, bruh, that's what it's all about.

[Smithee]

I've gotten Pat Burrell to give me the finger in the middle of a game (told him he needs to stop banging whales in the bathroom of the Irish Pub and that he has std's). Also made him double over in laughter making fun of Brett Myers.
Got Nick Swisher to give me the finger before too (know one of his ex-girlfriends and had some inside info)

We got a young Rasheed Wallace rele pissed @ a preseason game circa 1998/1999.

I was w/ 3 friends sitting real close in Oakland. As Rasheed was taking his second free throw our token friend yells out "What that nigga name???" and right as he shoots it the rest of us yell out "RASHEED WALL-ACE!!!!" in our best E-40 voice.

He made it but he turned and mugged us real hard for a good 4-5 seconds afterwards. The ball was halfway upcourt before he turned around to play D.

[peanut butter]

Once in the 2007 NBA playoffs I expressed my feelings of how (at that vry moment) I hoped Derrick Fisher's hospitalized daughter would die.

Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice


PEACE

[PopeyeJones]

man, i thought this thread was about talking shit in pickup basketball games, softball games, football games, etc.

because i talk a lot of shit.

People who talk shit in pickup basketball games tend to be pretty stupid and annoying, but overall harmless. It's only the self-appointed player/coaches that really get on my fucking nerves.

Overall ridiculing millionaires is a lot more fun than ridiculing other shlubs at the park, though.

[Prophecy]

The only pro player I've ever gotten a dirty look from was Jose Guillen because I yelled "Hola Jose, donde estan los steroids?" at him.

If you want a prime time place to talk shit where you know players will hear you go to a USF basketball game.

Realest shit you ever wrote. I actually was going to mention this in my first post. I actually started heckling Stan Heath a couple times when he would take out Ron Anderson.

Bob Huggins is a goldmine and if you get on him bad enough he may try to have you thrown out as i know from experience.

[Prophecy]

Do you or do you not talk shit when you go to sporting events? Yeah I love to talk shit when I'm close enough to the playing surface for people to hear it.

what are your limits?
Limits? Fuck limits.

what subjects do you tend to focus on, what do you make no mention of?
Nothing is out of bound but i usually stick to off the court stuff and appearance shit. Love to go to the "Darrrryyyylllll" style chants as well.

who have been some of your best targets?
As I just mentioned Bob Huggins is a gold mine and I've been warned about getting thrown out and seen others get thrown out at USF for getting after him all game.


what are some of your more memorable chirps?
Got a glare from Giambi at his first game in Tampa after his roids apology for screaming "Sorry Giambi not enough juice on that one" after he softly lined out.

Tortured Shannon Stewart in left field for 9innings with a "Shaaaaannnnnooooonnnnnn" Chant with some buddies. After about 5 innings he would look back and laugh or point the score board (Santana was working the Rays that game). He waived at us on his way back to the dug out when the game ended.

Got a laugh out of Greg Schiano with "Hey Schiano do you and Strahan go to the same dentist?!?!?"

Almost got thrown out of the Sun Dome for screaming the drink specials around town and various random alcohol related garbage at Huggins for half a game.

do you chirp fans of the other team?
Not usually but if someone is being an asshole i will chirp at opposing fans.

[Sylissez]

If I'm within ear shot, and I usually am, I'll get on a dude's case. But it's gonna be something that he doesn't hear all the time, or at least, something more specific than "you suck."

Ex. Last year, when Nyjer Morgan was with the Nats, I saw em play against the Phils. So me and a couple other people started busting his balls about how he shoulda stuck to hockey and whatnot. Got him to do some phantom ice skating in the outfield between innings.

I try not to curse if there's kids around, cause that shit ain't cool.

[Steve Lurkel]

Carmelo Anthony (courtside - actually talked a lot of shit back and forth with me),

MOAR

haha. ok. it was a few years ago so I don't remember every thing we said back and forth but, I had never sat courtside before or since so I waited the first quarter before talking shit as I wasn't sure what I could/couldn't say without getting tossed. Beginning of the second I yelled "I'm gonna start calling you marsh-melo because you're so soft" to which he shot a glare (and Jay Triano looked at me and laughed on some its funny cuz it's true shit), so the soft insults continued for the second quarter. I yelled out "Melo, Why basketball? Why not a sport you're good at? " during a stoppage near our seats. JR Smith was about to inbound the ball right beside me after a tv time out and Melo came over and called him off the inbound like "i got this" and comes right up to me, then i started telling him he had no 3 point range, to which he responded "you bought your tickets right?" "yeah, but at a discounted price cuz i would never pay full price to see a team that calls you their franchise"..."ok watch this"..."i been watching but all i keep seeing is you shooting bricks and making turnovers"...inbound ball - melo gets ball back, as he's shooting i yell "BRICK!" followed by a front rim miss.

that sort of ended up being the theme of the rest of the game, any time he came down our wing i was just yelling "bricks and turnovers melo, bricks and turnovers" (especially because he was having a bad game in that respect) added in that "jim boeheim hates you" and "Gerry McNamara is the only reason you guys won the championship at syracuse"...

at one point he came off the opposite wing and was definitely trying to throw it down as hard as possible, and I could tell he was about to come back up our side of the court to say something, but luckily Bargnani committed what must've been his hardest foul ever, and the only good thing he's ever done, coming across his arms with two hands and preventing the dunk.

the game ended and as melo walked by I said good game to him and he gave a nod.

[Steve Lurkel]

also ROFL at some of yuo guys, especially Pop's whole BJ Armstrong shit talking session, and the steroid comments. The "darrrrryllllllll" chants are always a great way to go. and rofl @ bob thuggins.

can't wait for the josh hamilton game. We were behind the Jays bullpen today, and when Frank Francisco tried to throw a ball up to us, it was way short of being possible to catch, so my brother yelled "You trying to Josh Hamilton me?" and Franciscos face went from straight face to big grin to shaking head with grin like "can't believe you just said that."

as soon as Josh Hamilton takes the field gonna yell "Josh, try not to kill anyone today"

followed by things such as: "change your number to 187" "they should name an orphanage after you" "Hey widowmaker, blahblah" "shouldn't you be trying to snort the baseline right now?" "hey after the game you wanna go do a li...oh wait...you wanna go for a be...oh wait....you wanna play catch...nevermind" "hey can you give me a ball? but like, hand it to me?" annnnd so forth and so on.

[Smithee]

Once in the 2007 NBA playoffs I expressed my feelings of how (at that vry moment) I hoped Derrick Fisher's hospitalized daughter would die.

Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice

Sports is serious. Hatin' is bad.

[Smithee]

"hey after the game you wanna go do a li...oh wait...you wanna go for a be...oh wait....you wanna play catch...nevermind"

[an-also]

I need to hit up a toronto sporting event with Steve Lurkel.

[Prophecy]

Lurkel=

[Sylissez]

Oh, here's a couple from last year. Went to the Redskins/Eagles MNF game in DC (Maryland, ya know). This was the one where Vick set his Madden to easy and went off.

So we were at a big ass tailgating party before hand, and there was one lady wearing a Theissman jersey. So she walked by, and we booed. Just messing around, ya know? And she got mad, turned around and said "Don't get beat up by a woman!" So I said "Don't get your leg broken by LT...oh wait, too late." And she walked away visibly umad.

Then later, in the stadium, these Redskins fans started yelling shit at me and my boy. "Eagles are criminals, Vick's a dog killer, blah blah blah." So I said "Hey, is Sean Taylor starting tonight? No? That's right. He got cut...from life...BY GOD!"

No idea how a rumble didn't break out at that one. Kinda feel bad for that one, but those douchebags deserved to hear it. Almost got into a rumble with a couple Skins fans early into the game, while I was trying to squash shit between them and my boy. They left after Vick threw his 3rd TD of the 1st quarter.

[wheels]

My seats at Wrigley are by the bullpen. My buddy's got seats by the other bullpen. My personal favorite target is Jeff Smardzjzisjza. We sit like 3 rows up.

"Hey Jeff, can't you throw the ball any faster?"

"Pujols would have taken that yard"

"Ok you got the balls down, now practice throwing some strikes."

"Do you have any idea how to spell your last name?"

"You need to practice man, if eight or nine guys get hurt you might have to start."

"Try not to let them hit anything, your defense is terrible."

A friend of mine says he got him to throw a ball in to play one time, I didn't see it.

[Kid That's Lifeless]

The only pro player I've ever gotten a dirty look from was Jose Guillen because I yelled "Hola Jose, donde estan los steroids?" at him.

If you want a prime time place to talk shit where you know players will hear you go to a USF basketball game.

Realest shit you ever wrote. I actually was going to mention this in my first post. I actually started heckling Stan Heath a couple times when he would take out Ron Anderson.

Bob Huggins is a goldmine and if you get on him bad enough he may try to have you thrown out as i know from experience.

I can only imagine. How many references to drunk driving did you make?

I had to work during the Louisville game this year, which pissed me off because I wanted to yell "Is Karen Sypher walking through that door?" at Rick Pitino.

[Kid That's Lifeless]

Almost got thrown out of the Sun Dome for screaming the drink specials around town and various random alcohol related garbage at Huggins for half a game.

Just saw this. Shit like this can only be appreciated if you've experienced the silence of the Sun Dome. Goddamn, that is good work and I will be stealing this until I graduate. Hope we play WV at home on a Thursday so I can cordially invite him to nickel beer night at Bulls Club.